There are many ways to make a funeral service personal and meaningful and to reflect the individual wishes and traditions of the person and family.
While it is important to preserve dignity and respect, we also understand that an appropriate farewell, eases the pain of bereavement and allows enduring memories to live on in the hearts of those who loved, admired and respected them.
Some suggestions are provided here, but we encourage you to discuss your thoughts with us. At Heritage, we can access a wide range of resources to help you to celebrate a life.
Candle being lit
Funeral Notice
A funeral notice in the local or other newspapers are a convenient way to inform the wider community of the death of the person. We will help you with the wording and then place the notices on your behalf. In the case of a private funeral, a death notice is usually placed after the funeral service. In country areas, often a radio notice is a useful way to inform family and friends. We also place notices on this website with the family’s permission.
In most newspapers, you are able to personalise the notice with colours, photos and special borders.
Candles
Donations
Many families request that a donation to charity would be preferred, instead of sending flowers.
We can arrange to have donation envelopes available at the service.
Eulogy and Words of Remembrance
This is a very personal way of remembering a life’s journey and is usually presented by a family member, close friend or colleague.
Help with Writing a Eulogy
If you have been asked to write the Eulogy or Words of Remembrance, it can at first seem quite daunting. To help, Heritage Funerals has put together the following suggestions on writing the Eulogy as well as some useful tips.
Before you start to write:
- Take time to sit quietly or go for a walk, to relax and think about what you will say.
- Take time to prepare the Eulogy.
- Ask other family members or friends for their thoughts and memories.
- To keep the impact of the tribute, keep it reasonably short, three to ten minutes is usually long enough.
- Use stories, humour if appropriate and quotes.
- Ask a trusted person to listen to your draft and obtain their feedback.
There are a number of themes that come across in Eulogies, such as:
- Life history – this can be a short history of a person’s life. It often reveals aspects of the deceased’s life that was not generally known to others.
- Memories – this is an insight not only into the life of the deceased but of memories, both good and bad, shared with them.
- Tribute – Share with others the highlights and achievements of your loved one’s life.
- Legacy – This focuses on what they have left behind. This could be their children, changed lives, projects, significant qualities or their values and ethics passed onto future generations – their heritage.
Delivering the Eulogy
Unless you are a natural speaker, write it down and practice reading it out aloud.
Write or type out the Eulogy in large print to make it easier to read. Highlight parts so you do not miss them.
As a support, you may plan to have another person to stand with you or be ready to take over if you feel you cannot continue.
Speak slowly, clearly, project your voice, look up at the audience from time to time to make eye contact so people engage with you.
Remember, no-one at the service expects perfection, tears are a natural expression of the grief you are experiencing.
Mourners are there to share the memories with you and will be supportive and understanding. Most of all be yourself. It is the sentiments behind the words that will have the most meaning.
More choices to consider
Readings and Poetry
Family or friends may choose a poem or reading that adds significance, meaning and individual touches to the service.
Pallbearers
Usually, six pallbearers are needed to carry the coffin. You may like to ask relatives and friends to help. It can be a good way of giving others an opportunity to be involved on the day and is considered an honour.
However, as the coffin can often be very heavy to carry and cemeteries uneven, please ensure that your pallbearers are fit and strong enough to carry out this duty safely for all concerned.
RSL, Masonic Lodge or Clubs
RSL and Masonic Lodge services can be arranged upon request. Heritage Funerals provides an Australian Flag free of charge to the family of returned servicemen and women as a mark of respect.
We liaise with various clubs eg. Football, Bowling, Golf, who may wish to place club notices or provide a guard of honour etc.
Candles
We are able to provide beautiful candles with photo of your loved one and their name embedded on the side.
This candle can be lit at the ceremony and then on special occasions such as Anniversaries or Christmas.
Lock of Hair
Some people wish to keep a lock of hair from their loved one, to be placed in a locket or just kept safely at home.
Fingerprints, Hand-prints and Footprints
For babies and young children who have passed away, a precious keepsake is prints from tiny hands and feet. These may be framed, preserved in plaster or cast into jewellery. Fingerprint jewellery is also available for adults.
However, we can also arrange for your loved one’s fingerprint to be cast in silver to be worn as a pendant or bracelet charm.
White Doves and Butterflies
The release of white doves or butterflies (depending on availability) adds a symbolic touch and is usually at the conclusion of the service.
The Cortege or Procession
Led by the Hearse, the cortege goes from the funeral service venue to the cemetery or crematorium. You may request the cortege to pass by the family home or business.
Or perhaps you would like to escort the cortege with vehicles such as trucks, vintage cars, motorbikes or horses depending on your loved one’s interests and passions.
Candles
Live Web-Streaming and Video Recording
Thoughts and memories during the funeral tell the story of a lifetime. Sharing this occasion can bring great comfort to family and friends who are unable to attend in person. At our Heritage Chapel, we offer live web- streaming of the service to family and friends throughout Australia and to any part of the world, so family and friends who are not able to travel or attend, may watch and join you in spirit. We can also video the service to create a lasting memory.
The service is discreetly recorded, streamed and stored, providing privacy- controlled access for viewing via the internet in real time or later on.
We can also arrange to live web-stream the service from other venues such as the Crematorium Chapel, Churches, Graveside and other locations.
There are many reasons why you may be forced to miss the funeral of a loved one. By offering this webcasting service, you, your family or friends that aren’t able to be there on the day can still watch the service and be part of the funeral. All that is needed is an internet connection and a device that can display video and an email invite to access the recording.
Two hands comforting each other